3 aliens 2 humans and me
by lizzie-bean
Summary: chp 9. this day will go down in history. im baccccccccccck. read.
1. Default Chapter

**Title:3 aliens, 2 humans and me**

**Author: lizzie_bean**

**Category: haven't really developed much of one yet, but give me time**

**Summary: okay well its bout the 'pod squad' on the road. Im afaid its yet another Liz tells the story things, but its got a bit of a twist…and its relatively interesting, oh and witty don't forget that...well I think its an okay story**

**Disclaimer:** I don't own any of the characters, but the point of view and wit is mine, but that's it

**Feedback: I took the time to write it for sheer entertainment, the least you could do it feedback**

 So….here I am. In a tiny little van with 2 other humans and 3 aliens. Many people after reading that first sentence would think that I'm a little….how do I put it…insane. Well I not. And after reading that, the same people probably think I've entered a state of extreme denial. Well I haven't. good the spiral of insanity never ends, anyway I think you have gotten the point, if not then stop reading, cos its jus going to get a hole lot worse. 

Okay, so I thought I knew these people, the pod squad as Maria likes to put it. I mean I've known them and their exceedingly consequential secret for a good 3 and a half years, but in truth I never really made much of an effect to get to know there human sides. Well of course I know max, the love of my life, _sigh_ the man that I will spend the rest of my days on earth-or any other plant with, for that matter. There's also Maria, who I have known my entire life and know absolutely everything about, and when I say everything I mean exactly that. Maria never leaves out the **excruciating **details on things. however Michael and Isobel have always been an unanswered mystery to me. And until now I was glad of that fact. Who wants to get to know an ice queen, and a man that finds it very hard to show any human emotion? To top it of its not really easy to start a decent conversation with Michael, when every god damn word that comes from his sharp tongue, has some kind of deep sarcastic meaning. But they both have different sides, and I will admit that I have not seen those gentle fluffy cuddy sides, but I've heard about them, that counts for something rite? God I believe in other planets, time travel, aliens and space ships so I think I will take a chance and believe that that sensitive side of them does exists. Well maybe exists.

Then there's Kyle. Many question marks need to be put by his name… what the hell, Kyle???????

When did he change so much? When? He use to be so ' I'm Mr. Jock Jockson and all the girls lovvve me' don't get me wrong he was always a decent guy-I mean I would have to think so, because I sure didn't date him to make statement-did I ? No no no. I liked him…really I did! but he always had these really bad things about him, like the fact that he was way to boastful about his sporty abilities, and was just and genuine jack the lad who had no real path in life, unless drinking beer, watching TV is a life style. Looking at him now I wonder how he was able to pull off the U-turn that he has managed. However ladies and gentleman, that doesn't stop Kyle valenti from being a complete moron. I know I'm just saying this in a fit of rage and I will most probably regret it….mah it makes me feel better. Besides look after number 1, that's what I ALWAYS say (I have never used that saying in my in my Whole life, but as I explained,  I'm in a fit of rage so all false comments are justified) so ANYWHO…on to why Kyle is a moron, well everybody knows that I have a aunt that lives in Florida and that I go there as much as I can to unwind. Well, once upon a time I took Kyle there with me, well I was going and Kyle invited himself for 5 days, and I will admit it we had a great time and he loved it there. What's the problem I hear you cry?!

It all started when Isobel asked a question-

'So guys where too now?' 

And hear is when Kyle volunteers to be the first member of my hit list.

'Hey why not go to Lizzies home in Florida?

Now I know that he meant to ask me first right? He meant to say 'hey Liz what about going to your home in Florida?' and that's what made me mad at first but I thought that being the great guy that Kyle has turned out to be, he will see the error of his ways and add a 'well if Liz wants to' to the end of his suggestion. So I didn't object and just waited till I, the sponsor of the trip to Florida was asked…and apologised to for not being asked first…then I'd say no. however boys and girls, that never came instead was

'Well what's it like?' from Isobel

'Its really nice, you can see the ocean from Liz's window and near the bottom of the house is a little river where Liz's friends always hang out' Kyle informed them. Are you hearing the Dawson's creek theme tune too?

'Kyle's been there? I didn't know you took Kyle there?' Max looked at me with this expiration that asked, no screamed 'why haven't you taken me? 

Before I could answer I was thrown into the madness of the rapidly speaking people in the van

Yes I've gone-and and and' Kyle could hardly get his words to quickly, of fear of being interrupted. 'Its really good fun, Liz's friends are really great to hang out with, especially Pete and bil-'

'Yeah ok whatever. So is it safe can we go there?' was a question from Michael

'well I don't see why not, I mean Liz has gotten visions every time something bad was going to happen were ever we have been, so she would see if it was a bad idea. And any way we really need to go somewhere that that we can get a decent nights sleep, I have had it with these crappy hotels..' once again Isobel was interrupted by Michael that was once again growing impatient with the others ranting.

'so we go' what we go!! WHAT HAS ANY ONE ASKED ME.? 'Unless…' ah thank you. We all know that he is going to say 'unless Liz don't want to' so lets have it' UNLESS  the crystal ball, gets a bad vision that will damn us all, every one straight?' that's just dandy. Put all the pressure on me. Thank you very much Michael, oh and welcome to seat number two on my hit list.

'Hey guys no one has asked Liz about this, so no one is going to Florida unless its ok with her' well max did a good and a bad thing there. He told every one off for not asking me =good, he put more pressure on me=bad. But how can I hold anything against that gorgeous man.

'Oh Liz you don't mind do you?'

'Why would Liz mind?'

'Sorry for not asking but I would like to see Pete again, that guy is great fun'

'so are we going'

'I love Florida…max remember when we when to Florida as kids'

'So are we going??' 

And in between the madness, I still had that damn Dawson's creek tune in my head. 'I don't wanna wait..' hey I think  that's strike two against Kyle's good name. As I was trying to process who was saying what, I realized that Maria was not one to the voices that was giving me a head ache, which is highly ironic seining she usually is the only one giving me a head ache. But then as I looked back at the confused faces in the back my eyes locked with Maria, and it was like I heard her in my mind saying 'fake a vision Liz, fake it fake it Lizzie bean.' It was so clear and it made me laugh. So do you think that's a strike 3? Causing me to hear voices? Insanity? You know what out of the goodness of my heart I will let him of, cause im pretty sure im insane any way   

'SO ARE WE GOING?' came the loud voice that made every one shout up and wait for an answer…and so did i. I know, I know, stupid thing to do because the question was being directed at me…

'OH! Urm… urm' I looked from Maria then to max  for some help. Max glanced away from the road and gave me a loving look. I didn't know what to do, they wanted to go and if I said no, they would wonder why so I… 'I'm sure it will be fine for a little while but only if.. .'

'You don't get a vision.' Michael so kindly finished for me 'so off we go to Florida' but it wasn't what I was going to say. Any body else think I'm not being treated nicely here?

Let me just say that it was hell getting this on here so I would like to dedicate this to someone who helped me get it on

Thank you Barbara!! So every body what do you think id love to know so tell me-do I go on?  


	2. 50 miles to go

**Title: 3 aliens, 2 humans and me**

**Author: Lizzie_bean**

**Category: haven't really developed much of one yet, but give me time**

**Summary: okay well its bout the 'pod squad' on the road. Im afaid its yet another Liz tells the story things, but its got a bit of a twist…and its relatively interesting, oh and witty don't forget that...well I think its an okay story**

**Disclaimer:** **I don't own any of the characters, but the point of view and wit is mine, but that's it**

**Feedback: I took the time to write it for sheer entertainment, the least you could do it feedback**

**50 MILES TO GO**

Oh boy only 50 miles left! Good I'm just so excited to meet my loving family and all my friends in Florida, then  just have to ' hey well really cherished having you as a friend, but I'm on the run from the F.I.B, cause they have this wacky idea that we are aliens, so I most likely will never see you ever ever ever again…bye and have a great life, oh if you ever miss me, jus turn on the news, you never know you might just strike lucky and see me being carried away by men in black suits, in a straight jacket.' If you didn't pick up on it, that was sarcasm. Yep that's right, being around Kyle and Michael, also known as number 1 and number 2 on my hit list has brought out the sarcastic nature in me. Swell. There I go again. You see I'm not all to thrilled with my Roswell life going to my other life in Florida, that kind of the reason I never took max, did I  say kind of, silly me I meant that IS the reason I never took max. When the 50 miles are up my two completely different worlds are going to crash in to each other and its not going to be pretty. It's like the pod squad are tuna, and the Florida beach people are chocolate cake, now imagine mixing tuna and chocolate cake in a mixer… and then eating it with ice cream…yum. That's what it's going to be like. See why I'm not all to thrilled for the week of each ahead.    

I guess there is a bright side. I get to see my family and friends before I leave and begin to grow gills and a third eye…max did say he was joking about that right? any way it would be nice to see them one last time, but it's the 'hey aunt Helen id like you to meet max, he is the man I have married at the young age of 18, and has taken me away from my home, you two will get on like a house on fire.' which is technically true they will, max is the house and my lovely over protective aunt will be the fuming fire. Then they will have to meet my uncle…did I ever mention that I really despise my uncle, no despise doesn't quite feel like the right word, hmmm…how about my hatred towards him put a new meaning to intensely despising some one. There that will do, well until I can come up with some thing new anyway. I feel this way about him for many reasons, one being the fact at he is a total pervert. Really he is when ever he she's a remotely attractive girl, he will make a total ass out of him self by making some sort of sexual remark that makes me want to throw up. And not only that but he also believes that 'a women's place is In the kitchen, preparing the food for the husband' god, things like that make me go from throwing up to slapping him many times in the face. Maria is fully aware of his annoying little ways, and will stay clear of him, but Isobel… oh god I will have to watch him around her.  Then there's Pete. Pete. God there's so much I can say about him, he is very funny and general fun to be around. I've known him and jack all my life and when ever things got hard in Roswell, and Maria wasn't around I would call him and talk to him. Of course I never told him about the Czechoslovakians, god that would be a very brainless thing to do the sort of thing that Kyle would do, not me. Ha ha ha. Can you tell I'm still angry at him, it will pass right? Back to talking about Pete. I would call him and he would make me laugh and for a while every thing would be okay. But he is travelling at the moment, going round America to see the sites. So I won't get to see him. Who else, oh god there's jack I think I mentioned him. Well I've known him forever as well, but we are more like friend of a friend, and when ever we see each other, we have been known to hurl abuse at each other. We have such a deep loving bound. Plus many girl friends and Ashley who I hate. So normally when you hate some one you try your utter most best to stay away from them, like you would do a life fretting disease, well its like me and my uncle I hate him but I have to be around him when I go there cause he is family. Do you get it? Ashley is family. Were cousins, and I hate her and I'm pretty sure she  feels nothing but hatred  for me, if not then all the hate mail I reserved from her has been taken the wrong way and I probably shouldn't have sent here the computer virus….MAH oh well cant change been and gone.

Max got tried of driving and Michael and Kyle refused cause apparently they BOTH drove before max. How dose that work? Anyway I was about to say that I would take the wheel when Maria agreed to take over so I stayed in the passenger seat to keep her company.

'Hey chica you okay?'

sure sure, I'm dandy' I think I must have let out a hint of frustration on the 'dandy' and me even saying the word 'dandy' would be strange to any one but my best friend picked up on it with in a spilt second.

'dandy? Okay the day you say dandy its all over'

'bring on the over' 

'Liz I know that this is going to be hard for you, bringing the pod squad to Florida and you probably don't need me asking this but…' at that moment my head which had been looking out of the window turned slowly over to Maria, and my eyes rolled over with it.

'yes Ria'

'we wont be seeing your prev of an uncle by any chance cause that men is freaky beyond belief and every time I go there I can feel his beady little evil  eyes following me everywhere I go…' you have to laugh at Maria, is isn't half dramatic. When she gets like this her voice becomes a high pitched groan that does on and on in my head. This groan that can do 3 things to me, 1. Give me a head ache within the first five minutes that amazing, lasts the entire day. 2. when what ever it is that she is being so dramatic about can actually interest me and by the end leave me feeling hyper active and excited. 3. make me go to sleep, which has happened before. It was when Maria was telling me about when a puppy was laughing at her shoes, (not only do I worry about my own sanity, but I fear Maria's said bye bye to her many years ago) and I fell to sleep, but lucky it was on the phone and when I woke up about 25minuites later she was still talking and hadn't realized. Phew if she had I would have felt the cold chill of Maria blocking you. Oooo its not nice. Lucky I get away with it on many counts, cause I'm her best friend but, I still fear Maria in a bad mood, ever since the incident with the ice cream and teddy bears…no I cant go on, god Mr. fluffy never saw it coming. Maybe I will tell you that story some other time when I'm not talk-

'Liz are you listening to me'

'Yes!' I say rather enthusiastically, in fact way too enthusiastically and I thought she would pick up on the fact that it was just to hide that I wasn't paying any attention what so ever, instead was taking a walk down memory lane in my head 

'So we wont be going to see him then?' she asked hopefully

'yes we will. Maria I don't like him either but I have to go see my aunt, therefore I will have to see my uncle. I cant go to the town that she lives in and not go see her for the last time ever'

'You don't like her all that much do you'

'Maria' I said in a stubborn voice that commanded her to stop

'But I'm wearing a really short skirt and sleeveless top and'

'We are going' came the reinforced stubborn voice. They forced me to go, I didn't want to in the first place, so I was going to say my goodbyes once and for all.

'You know you should have faked a vision no body would have known' huh? That's what I was imagining Maria saying, I was imagining wasn't I? her lips were not moving so…I wasn't mind-reading LOL . No I'm just being stupid, I just know Maria really well and assumed that's what she was thinking that from the look on her face. yeah that's it. Ha mind reading, what total crap.

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Please review, just click on the button and you will be on your way! I need you too tell me how you want to here more of, and what relationships you think I should try to build up on.  And what do you think should happen when they all meet each other? Your opinions count, so let me know what you talented fanfictioners think !!   


	3. 50 miles later

        **50 miles later…******

'hey guys we are here!!'  Maria half shouted half sung in the van.

 ' hey Liz this better be fun else I'm going to be pissed at the fact it took so long to get here for disappointment' oh yeah cause it takes a lot to disappoint Michael.    

'yeah cause Michael, you had a million better places to be' this got his attention, he wasn't used to me answering back 'and any way MICHEAL it wasn't my idea to come'

'yes it was' oh my god. How does Maria put up with this grr.

'No it was not'

'yes it was-'

'no it was not!'

'Yes it was.' Every body else in the van was just watching us, there heads swinging from Michael to me every time one of us spoke.

'Michael…look this is stupid, one of us has to be mature here,' I always am the mature one, I always back out, sod it. 'and you are mistaken if you think its going to be me!!  N-O-I-T-W-A-S-N-O-T!' 

Hey hey, guys, chill rite? It was actually  my idea' Kyle said looking at me and raising his hand.

'yeah, and don't think I've forgotten KYLE.' I said bitterly, and shoot him a stay away from me cause your life depends on it glare 

'Ditto' did Michael just say ditto

'Ditto? You didn't even know in the first place!'

'I did…I was just winding you up parker,' micheal filled me in with a little evil grin. 'you needed to let it out, you've been all stressed all the way here.'

'Bite me'

Just helping you out parker'

'Michael leave her alone god I swear sometimes you are so insensitive.' I smiled at Isobel to show my appreciation, and she smiled back. Could this be the beginning of me seeing the nice fluffy friendly side of Isobel Evans? Or was it that she was annoyed at Michael for hogging all the back sit space?  Hmmm yeah that makes more sense.  

with that I turned back to the road and saw that  we had reached the town centre. Wow it was nice to be back here. This place was like a second home, and there was so must more to do here then there was back in Roswell. 

'Where shall we stop? Liz do you want to go to the perv-I mean your uncles' house first?

'No, I don't know about you guys but I'm hungry so why don't we stop and go to a café or some thing'

'well I  do with a decent meal and max is asleep but he told me before that he was hungry for some cake with a spicy topping, which sounds good to me as well. how bout you Michael?' max was asleep, he was completely gone in the side seat that was just behind me. I turned around, and pushed his hair to one side and out of his chocolate brown eyes. I smiled to y self over just how perfect he was, and he was mine, cause there's no way that  another Tess hardy is going to come out of the blue, literally, and steal him from me. My moment lost in thought was never meant to be, because I was pulled out of it by Michael giving a rather long answer to Isobel's question    

'I could do with a burger, fries shake onion rings and some of that cake with the spicy topping, oh and some pizza if they have any with out cheese….and a coke would go down nicely right about now

'Hungry?' Kyle asked sarcastically

'Come on lay off, I haven't eaten for hours!'

'So are you planning to blow all our money on your own food, or do we get some?' Maria asked Michael, unsure of his answer; she eyed him from the mirror in the front seat'

'no you can have-'

'Your leaf over's?' Kyle finished for Michael. Okay angry chart for Kyle: was 100% went down to 75% and continued dropping on the quite drive over here and got to a sound 50%. Then when Michael reminded me that Kyle is the reason we are here, so the rage went back up to 75%, but because he is a comical genius I think he should get a break. Rage down to 25%.... for now. Kyle's comical input made  himself me, and Isobel laugh, but the look on Michaels face when we started to laugh put the icing on the cake. A pure classic moment was about to begin.

'Look fine, laugh. I wont eat anything, I will starve'

'God Michael, how dramatic can one person be' and that boys and girls, came from the award winning drama queen her self =Maria. As soon as the words left her mouth I knew that Kyle wouldn't be able to resisted a dig at her, and to tell the truth I was finding it hard to hold a comment back, but had to cause she was my best friend, and there is plenty she knows about me that is Kyle knew, he would drown in the verbal comments.

'God Michael, if Maria ever said that to me, id really be worrying'

And what exactly do you mean by that?

'Oh nothing Miss. A puppy laughed at me cause of my shoes.'

'Okay so you believe in a big fat guy that meditated…a lot…'

'Maria before you continue I just want to tell you that he is called "Buddha"'

Ok fine what ever but you can't believe in a puppy that has a good fashion sense and was able to pick up on my fashion disaster and then laugh? Is that what you are telling me? Huh? She said in a voice that said 'I dare you to say yes'

'well yes, I think I can safely say yes' his quick blunt straight to the point answer made Isobel laugh, and you know how on your own you can keep it in, but when some one else gives in to the bubbling laughter inside, you instantly give in as well and then it become impossible for any of you too stop? Well that's what happened. I saw Isobel cave then I did and then was shortly joined by Michael. But then I remembered how bitterly cold Maria gets when you get on the wrong side of her, and stopped laughing and looked up to find that Maria was not at all impressed. Just the as if on clue…max jumped in his sleep and then shouted out

'I'm drowning in coupons!!' then he woke up and had full attention of every body in the van.

Hey, something you want to explain Maxwell?' max then rubbed his eyes shifted consciously in his seat then looked at me to the side of him

'Weird dream'

'Figured that much' Kyle added, prompting a more detailed explanation, which max did not intend to give him

'sooo, anyway what did I miss?' when he asked this question we all looked at each other, not knowing where to start

'This and that' Isobel responded, releasing the pressure from every one else from saying someing first.

'nothing important' I said looking in to his eyes

'are you sure' he said looking at me, I would have responded by softly nodding to him but once again Michael answered for me

' you didn't miss a thing okay Maxwell? Now I'm hungry s I was wondering is it still up for discussion if I eat or not? What do you reckon parker ?

'why you asking me?

Then I could see a mischievous glint in his eye ' because parker, it was your idea to come.'

Oh god here we go again' Isobel let out and then fell against the padded seat. But instead of getting angry I found this amusing. Michael and my eyes were locked and I could see that he wanted to laugh. So did i

'You know what? Since you are so entertaining Mickey, I will let you eat.'

 He gave out a little laugh 'Your all right parker'

I laughed too. Hey, maybe there was a nice side to Michael.

'thank god I thought you too were going to have a show down, and its not fair. Why should you have all the fun. '

'Don't worry Kyle, if that's what you call fun, then you are going to have plenty.' Oh god it's the mr. fluffy scene all over again  

'Huh. Nothing seems like a lot'. 


	4. not even if your life depends on it

**Title: 3 aliens, 2 humans and me**

**Author: Lizzie_bean**

**Category: haven't really developed much of one yet, but give me time**

**Summary: okay well its bout the 'pod squad' on the road. Im afaid its yet another Liz tells the story things, but its got a bit of a twist…and its relatively interesting, oh and witty don't forget that...well I think its an okay story**

**Disclaimer:** **I don't own any of the characters, but the point of view and wit is mine, but that's it**

**Feedback: I took the time to write it for sheer entertainment, the least you could do it feedback**

**_Not even if your life depends on it._**

Getting out of the hot crowded bus was one of the most liberating things I has done since coming on this fugitive mission. But I couldn't decided what it was that I was feeling in the pit of my stomach, great pending dread or a weird kind of excitement. Thinking about this began to feel absolutely pointless; as I started to number the pros and cons of coming, and ending up going round in circles, and the beginning question never got an answer. It's a bit like the question 'which came first the chicken or the egg?" well a lot more people ponder over that question then the one that was spinning over in my mind "is bringing my alien friends here to meet my unsuspecting family a good idea?" hmmm. Well like I said its pretty much pointless thinking about it, cause hey presto, we're here.

The indication  for us to start going is when Mickey ( my new nick name for him, if he can always call me parker I'm sure as hell going to call him Mickey.) shouted piercingly  ' lets go!' causing every one to bring there hands up too there ears

Even later on in the café max and Maria were still holding there ears.

'come on Maxwell, I shouted all the way back in the van, which is like light-years ago now

' Michael did you ever think that your unique power was the power to deafen every one within 30 miles radius?' max playfully told Michael  then leaning over the tableand hitting him on the head

'Come on max, that's not his unique gift…his unique gift is annoying the hell out of people!' Isobel piped  up from beside Michael  in also playfully tapping him on the knee.

'Amen to that' I heard Maria mutter, from beside me and I then got enough courage to look her in the eye to see if she was pissed at me. We locked eyes I smiled, silently praying that she wasn't. She smiled back. Wahoo! But I got the feeling that she was plotting to put sugar on Kyle's chips and make him think its salt??? Where the hell did that come from? God I need undisturbed sleep ASAP. Mickey didn't seem to mind his friends that were more like siblings to him hitting him, and we were all laughing over the joint joke that had been made. SO Kyle thought he would join in the fun and games. Probably thinking it was a good idea…oh how wrong he was.

'yeah Michael!' he said smiling but as soon as he tried to slap Mickey in the chest

Mickey instantly caught his hand in the air. Everybody's laughs stopped and max looked down at me as if to say 'kyle crossed the line'

'don't touch me man.'

'But I was just-'

'I don't know or like you enough for you to be touching me' his face was dead serious. And not one of them had moved. If it had been me I wound have been shit scared. But Kyle's a clown, not much can get him down (not intended to rhyme) and he burst out laughing… right in Mickey face.

'wow, intense.' Kyle let out after his laughing fit.

'Okay guys I hate to split out this little testosterone poisoning display here, but I'm really hungry HURRY UP!' Isobel ordered them with clear frustration in her voice.

' no they don't need to hurry up, they need to stop, like right now!' said another frustrated female to my side.

' what ever Maria I will stop, I just need to know that Kyle has learnt his lesson…have you learnt your lesson?' he asked kyle still gripping his arm'

'Oh yeah don't worry. I won't touch you ever again, not even if you are falling off a high cliff and in order to save your life I have to touch you, I won't. I will let you fall.' 

'So we agree'

'We agree'

'No touching'

'Not ever'

'Even in a life and death situation-'

'I will let you die'

'Promise?

'Oh yeah'

'Good' 

'Great…now let go of my arm because you know that's considered touching.' With that Mickey released him and looked at max who I noticed was eyeing Michael disapprovingly. He simply shrugged at max and smiled. I laughed at the scene on the table it was just so classic, and then I collapsed on to max. I love the feeling of him holding me. Its pure bliss. May be this wasn't going to be so bad after all. I closed my eyes and I just listened to what was going on the table and I picked up on Maria and Kyle's conversation. 

'so you aint mad at me any more?'

'mad? Me? Ha ha ha. Kyle I was never mad' liar!!

'good. I'm glad.'

'Our friendship means a lot to me.' She was being very sweet, a little too sweet. 

'Me too.'

'Hey Kyle would you like some salt and vinegar, but don't forget the SALT. And on with the evil plan.

'Urmmm… sure why not'

'Maria I can put it on myself… Maria, Maria stop… stop'

'I want to do it for you-ah ouch OUCH!  You're hurting my hand my hand MY HAND!!'

' I'M NOT WORRY ABOUT YOUR HAND, IM WORRYING ABOUT MY DINNER. GIVE ME THE SALT'

'FINE-oh my would you look at that its sugar ha, wow god you stopped me' nice cover up if I were Kyle I wouldn't suspect any thing.

'Hmm' yep he knew her evil little scam. 

Just as everything was going silent I heard Isobel

'Hi can we help you,? Who was she talking to? I opened my eyes to she and I just couldn't hold it in

'arhhhhhhhh' I jumped up from max and put my hand on my heart and looked in to the eyes of my enemy, or one of my enemies. 

Are you alright liz?' max asked me concerned

'Im fine' I told him still holding my glare with Ashley, also known as 'it'

' oh darn what a shame! For a minute there I thought it was going to be the best day of my life, but your still alive, but  seeing you jump like that comes a close second' it said and she seemed extremely amused ' well are you going to introduce me to your loser friends?'

'sure!' I said enthusiastically. 'Every body I'm sure you will be pleased to meet Satan. Oh which brings up a point if you're here whose running hell?' to top of this insult I smiled at her and watched the smile slip of her face. I ignored the shocked faces around me.    

'You now what lizzie?'

'No and I don't want too'

'You have the personality of wallpaper. You are dank and filthy. Opps to late!' she meant to do that grrr.

 'Yeah well A half-wit gave you a piece of his mind, and you held on to it, so why should I listen to you?'

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  Please review!!!!!!! Come on people give me something to work with.


	5. bread rolls, teaming up and family truth...

…so why should I listen to you? I finished, and then watched with great pleasure as her eyes curled up in to an evil glare and her mouth formed an o shape. I sat there and  sweetly smiled, cause I know that this would show her that I was enjoying making a fool out of her in front of my friends. It all very 3rd grade playground mode, but the truth was I WAS enjoying it.

'Liz, I think I speak for everyone when I say confusion has settled in.' max said looking down on me, but I didn't want to look away from her the…the…the, darn it I just cant think of anything bitchy enough.

'Not me max, I know her and her evil ways,' Maria said still holding her hand 

'Yeah I don't know you but I know your type.' Isobel said calmly giving her the well known ice queen glare and talking directly to the enemy 

'Yeah and what's my type'

'Bitch'

'Oh and who are you.' With that Isobel stood up and stood next to ashley. Then looking down at her with the same look said

'Your boss, or maybe your great holy god' she that stopped for an instant to muse over this then gracefully and calmly continued. 'Either way back off.' 

'Hey, no need to get so defensive "boss" but me and Liz are ALWAYS doing our little banter. It's totally harmless.' Then she turned to me with a wicked little grin on her face. 'Right… cousin.' Oh that amused her. I looked around and Kyle mouthed  C-O-U-S-I-N widely, as if he had lost the ability to speak, but one swift and, what looked to be a painful nudge in the ribs from Maria cleared that problem instantly. 'cousin, and, always I mean ALWAYS…Liz you must be a saint, I mean I  mediate regularly and even I'm struggling. Just looking at… at… at, I'm sorry I don't think I got your name'

'Ashley'

'Thanks. Just looking at Ashley is just so yuck!!' 

'Its been no walk in the park but I'm lucky,' I looked at the faces around the round table and all the confused faces asked the same question, HOW?... 'Being only cousins I didn't receive the mentally challenged gene'

'OH. Yeah. See how that's lucky for you Liz.' Kyle said

'Hey Liz what about-' Ashley was about to protest about something but never got the chance

'hey Pandora-back in your box I'm talking now and I have something very very very really intensely serious and relevant to this particular moment that I would like to share with my fellow friends, so I guess you don't have to listen.' Everybody leaned in to hear the intensely serious news that Michael was so egger to share, he could have spotted something suspicious, or strange that could in danger use all. Then he looked at me. 'Liz' oh god he is serious it's the F.B.I! Oh god' Liz I can't believe she's your cousin.' Mickey then began laughing…a lot. '…and the plot thickens!' he added than continued to laugh at my situation. But it didn't last long. Max noticed just how uncomfortable it was making me and to my delight through a bread roll that hit him right on the nose.

'Ouch…hey look I was just…'

'Michael'

But there's absolutely no need to…'

'Michael'

'Fine. Oh mighty fearless lead…'

'Michael' and then a second bread roll sped towards Mickey, but this time it came from the standing Isobel who had been watching the display of "brotherly love"

'would people stop throwing bead at me, come on people, its not right,  and it just wont do…your wasting food!' with that Michael took a mouthful out of the roll, then noticed everybody looking at him, and then through a breadful mouth he innocently said 'WHAT?' maybe it was true that the way to a mans heart is through his stomach

 Isobel then rolled her eyes at him and then looked at max 'oh god I can not be believe you two are the…'very almost making the very same mistake that Michael had she smartly stopped herself. Then with a little sigh and rolled her eyes back to the unwelcomed guest 'look miss bad outfit, we don't approve of your bad insults, do we?' Isobel then turned back to us and as if it were in a play and had been rehearsed everybody slowly and silently shook their heads.

'Wait Izzy I agree that 1. We don't approve 2. they are BAD insults but the out fit, not all that  bad, however would help if it wasn't two sizes to small, face it your not a size 10.' Ouch Maria really went all out, I laughed out loud. And Ashley was on her way out the door, like a dragon returning to its cave or a dog going back to its kennel, oh I like that one better…the animal kingdom is fun (can you believe this is what I think about?? Weird)   

'Amazing Maria and Isobel I appalled you, there's only one other person I know that has ever been able to get Ashley so annoyed that she has left the room, well done!'

'Thank you Liz' Maria said taking a sip from her drink

'No need for all that Liz, with my experience it was a piece of cake' Isobel said rejoining the group at the table.

'no Iz your should take pride, Lizzy is right you two are regular bitches' after he said this he casually took a swig from his drink and Maria spit hers out as soon as she heard the comment.

'CAN I JUST VERIFIELY THAT, THAT IS BY NO MEANS WHAT I WAS SAYING!' I told the two women that were now giving glares to Kyle.

'What?' Kyle said after finishing his drink

'Not really much of a compliment Kyle' max told him softly holding back a snigger.

Kyle then looked from Isobel, also known as the ice queen and Maria the girl that had tried to ruin his diner and then he realised that he was in way over his head.

'believe me max, I'm seeing that now, get it SEEING IT, it's a joke cause you guys are glaring at me…

'kyle don't explain the joke' I told him, they would probably think he thought they were stupid in doing so.

'yeah man, if I was in your near death situation I would be thinking about how to take back the "bitch" thing' max told him, probably feeling sorry for him now.

'are you two aware that you haven blinked for like 2miniutes now? Is that normal?' micheal  told the two girls that would not stop looking, or rather glaring at kyle.

'look im sorry, it was a lot funnier in my head.'

'FUNNIER??'

it is seriously is freaky' micheal said

'maybe I shouldn't say words' kyle let out feeling defeated

'I agree' Isobel said'

'what Michael'

I second that' said Maria

'There non-blinking status'

'Huh?'

'Liz, is that something that they train all girls in school'

What?

The ability to say I want to kill you with your eyes'

'Michael don't be stupid' max said ' women are born with that'

'Look just stop it….please…I…don't…like it! Max helps me'

'Sorry' max said

miche-' Kyle turned to look at Michael who was looking like he was enjoying Kyle's unfortunate mishap. 'is there any point me asking you?

'Sorry man, you dug your own grave.'

I couldn't take it any more. So I slowly mouthed the words "I am sorry" to Kyle. It took 2 attempts before he understood.

'Oh I get-' cutting himself of he made his face serious and then said sweetly his line sweetly 'I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to offend-either of you, you  both were amazing.' There was a gap of silence.

'Like that's going to work' Michael sniggered

'Thank you Kyle you of the hook

'Yeah you can thank Buddha'

Yeah I will be thanking some one' Kyle answered and then winked at me. I couldn't let him die a horrible and painful death at the hands-eyes whatever of my two girlfriends. That would just be unfair.

'Wow, you two have ganged up on two people and won' max started obviously choosing his words carefully 'maybe you should consider becoming a team'

Max's suggestion didn't go down to well with Isobel, and it was apparent to everyone from the first look on her face.

'I will be president' Maria said in her normal chirpy voice.

'no thanks I work alone.' She said stubbornly and the leaned back on to the booth seat. 'probably live, and die alone as well' she added this and intended it to be too quite for any body else to hear, but yep you guessed it, EVERYBODY, well everyone in the pod squad sitting at that table heard, and it automatically made the tension go up and the atmosphere was immediately damped. She was missing Jessie and this was the key to her up and down emotions. In fact right now it was really hard to even hold a conversation with her, one minute she would be being nice and agreeing and then the next, boom! You feel like you have been beaten to almost death with your own rib bone. Let me tell you, its not nice or pretty…not something that you would like to experience…ever. But we all new the reason behind it, so we put up with it and just hope that one day soon she will feel able to open up to us….soon.

'Isobel it is going to get easier. It's never going to be okay that you had to live him behind, but maybe some day you can see him again' he stopped then fond my hand under the table and squeezed it with his own. 'its never to late to have what you would have had' I knew he was now talking from experience. Max looked down at me and smiled and I smiled back.

'Yuck yuck yuck YUCK'

Our attention was then snapped straight to Kyle 

'What is it Kyle?' I asked concerned by the look on his face

'My coffee it tastes….weird'

'Oh yeah, urm I was angry and after you hurt my hand I put salt in your coffee…woops' Maria told him then smiled at him

'Maria I'm not sitting next to you ever again, I'm not risking my dinner and first decent coffee since Roswell ever again.

'Kyle don't worry the coffee wasn't all that great'

'Not the point Maria!!'

Okay so I know that I haven't done all that much about Maria, so just for you pixie lovers I was thinking that I would base the next chapter around her. Do you think it would be a good idea to do it from a Maria point of view?? Tell me what you think. Oh and special thanks to the nice reviews, advice and suggestions that I received. Thank you.

 M      


	6. the strange world of micheal and maria

**Title:3 aliens, 2 humans and me**

**Author: lizzie_bean**

**Category: haven't really developed much of one yet, but give me time**

**Summary:well**** I have spit the group for this and am consontrating on micheal and maria. Its so fun writing for them. I am getting some amazing reviews and its so nice  to know that you are enjoying it.I thank you all. **

**Disclaimer:** I don't own any of the characters, but the point of view and wit is mine, but that's it

**Feedback: I took the time to write it for sheer entertainment, the least you could do it feedback**

Maria is wicked. As I say this it occurs to me that there are two meaning to this word. it means wicked as in great awesome amazing. The wicked also means harsh cruel and so on. why? Why not just have one meaning for one word. COOL. There's another one. Cool =great, swell yadda, yadda, yadda. or cool as in burr 'the water is cool' or question='what's the weather like?' Answer= 'cool' as in the temperature. What is this madness? Did every one get lazy. They probably thought 'well if we make up anew word then we have to update the dictionary, which is pointless cos nobody ever reads the dictionary (author speaking, a girl in our class read the dictionary once…can you believe it, from  a to z. she used to sit and read it at dinner…C-R-A-Z-Y. thought I would tell you that back to the story)  what the hell let there be to meaning for one word.

Can you imagine how confusing this could make a conversation? Okay I just confused my self. Anyway moving swifty on.

I love Maria dearly…most of the time.  but I mean wicked as in harsh and harsh to micheal. Well after we all left the café everybody wanted to do different things. Max had to go get gas

Maria wanted to wonder around in the florida sun

Micheal wanted to go with maria

Isobel felt sick and didn't feel like wondering

Kyle wonted to look around but didn't want to go with maria in fear of what she might do next (I don't blame him) he told me that that was not his idea of 'fun'I laughed at this then when I turned I heard him saw rather boldly 'I also what to look after isobel' which was  unual for kyle to open up about something like that, and his words were so full of concern and were very sincere so turned and ant told him

'be careful kyle' worried about his feeling and isobels

'why are there bad ass gangs in this little beach side town?' he said with a smirk

'no I mean abou-'

'liz your going to have to be our tour guide.' Maria said grabbing my arm and attention.

'hang on' I turned back and kyle was looking at me thinking over what I just said

'liz we need to go!! We only have an hour or so and I need to shop.'

'shop you are going to shop? I throught you said this would be fun?' micheal protested

'okay ria im coming' I smiled and then looked at Kyle. 'Talk bout this later ok?

'sure liz. That will be fine' he said sceptically before turning and going in to the van. The van that was now the only thing that we had that we like home reminded me of the van on 'scooby doo' and we were the pesky kids. Then micheal came up to me

'come on lets go'

micheal could be shaggy because  he loves his food. Shaggy= Michael. Lol I can visualise it now Michael dressed in the dorky green t-shirt. He probably looks more like Fred, but max would be Fred. The image of Michael dressed as shaggy made me laugh.

'What so funny parker?' Michael asked egger to hear

'Private joke' I told him sternly 

'What ever' he said like he didn't give a damn either way 'lets go' he said ready to go go go.

'Hey hang on I need to say bye to max' translation I need to kiss max for a long amount of time. He he.

I walked up to him and pulled him to me, and in to a long passionate heart stopping kiss. The only kind of kiss with max.

'I'm going to miss you' he said resting his fore head against mine.

'Me too' I pulled away 'love you and stay safe.' I told him

'love you too, I will and hope you do too' he kissed me yet again then pulled away

'go.' I said and out stretched my arm and pointed to the  van.

'SEE YOU LATER MAX AND KYLE, ISOBLE FEEL BETTER BYE BYE' maria shouted to the van that was pulling away.

 'Maria, we are running from the F.B.I I don't think shouting there names and waving your arms like a wind mill is the  way we wont to go'

'Michael chill. It's harmless'

'F.B.I, harmless' he made scales with arms 'sorry I don't know how you came to that conclusion.' 

  'Michael I'm waving goodbye to my friends you think people passing by are thinking "that girl is running from a secret government agency, better call the F.B.I?" you are just being paranoid.'

'no I'm being careful and when you are shouting their names at the top of your lungs, which let me tell you is pretty god damn loud, you are giving away our identities and putting them in danger'

'how is saying goodbye putting them in danger!'

'Maria you may as well have been holding a banner that says "we are here" and screaming at the top of your lungs "come kill us, come kill us, come kill us" cause that's the message you were giving to potential alien hunters' I was  completely forgotten about whilst this was going on and was glad . I didn't want to get dragged in to the strange world of Michael and Maria. But I needed to get their attention now.

'Guys' 

'Potential alien hunters? So that man that man buying flowers could be an alien hunter? How about the women with her two children that's talking to the women with the grocery bags do you think they are plotting how to kill us. Oh may be the kids aren't kids but special agent midgets dressed as kids, and the bags are full of weapons.'

'Guys'

'Okay Maria know your being ridiculous.' Michael told her

'No Michael I'm being sarcastic. You are being ridiculous.'

'GUYS'

'Know need to shout parker'

'Well I thought you would like to know that whilst you have been standing there auguring about bringing attention and the F.B.I' I stopped and tried to remember what it was they were fighting about 'and something about midges, people have been giving you funny looks and your during a great amount of attention to yourselves.

Maria started a slow clap. 'well done Michael'

'not like it matters, no F.B.I in this town.' Maria opened her mouth about to say something but settled for hitting him in the arm instead.  

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**I dedicate this to all the people that have reviewed. Lol I'm such a total kiss up…is it working?? Let me know when you REVIEW!! LOL tee hee**

**m**


	7. fun and games

**Title:3 aliens, 2 humans and me**

**Author: lizzie_bean**

**Category: haven't really developed much of one yet, but give me time**

**Summary:well**** I have spit the group for this and am concentrating on micheal and maria. Its so fun writing for them. I am getting some amazing reviews and its so nice  to know that you are enjoying it.I thank you all. **

**Disclaimer:** I don't own any of the characters, but the point of view and wit is mine, but that's it

**Feedback: I took the time to write it for sheer entertainment, the least you could do it feedback**

**Spoiler.**** I have taken or borrowed a small selected bit from two guys and a girl. I have re-written this to fit my story, its only a little bit. **

I spy with my little eye something beginning with s?'

'Stone' I guessed

'No' Maria said

'Street' Michael guessed

'No.'

Maria sounded like a five year old, so zealous and content to spend hour and hour and hours…playing the grand and pointless game of eye spy.

'Shop' I guessed again. There was a pause. I stopped. did I guess it right and stop this rubbish game I looked at her full of hope then at Michael.

'Did she get it right?' he said also wanting to end the game 'did she, did she?' no reply 'parker give me five!' Michael said then raised his hand to me 

'No. she got it wrong.' Maria said and unconsciously shifted her eyes. 

'What?'

'Its not my something that begins with s. carry on guessing.' Just like a five year old to cheat at eye spy.

'Look Maria I don't want to play. This game bites the big one.' Michael said. Maria slide her hand in to his 

'But I like this game, and its no fun with out you.' Michael looked down took a deep breath.

'Station' Maria looked at me and I grinned. She was good at playing puppet with Michael. Maybe I could learn a few things from her

'Nope'

'Stop.' I said suddenly. I had spotted an empty bench and my feet, god my feet hurt so much I was seriously considering going in to a hand stand and walking on my hands. But I thought this may look a little strange. Then I considered maybe getting Maria or Michael to give me a piggy back, but it would be pretty awkward to ask. Hmm I wonder why they call it piggy back. Pigs are fat and unattractive so is it saying you are to fat and unattractive to walk? Or may be you have a fat unattractive back? Or perhaps pigs let there young ride on their backs, does that imply that only your children can ask your for a piggy back? Who knows? Something to ponder.

'Liz there is a rule in this game it has to be an object, it can't just be "stop" that would be stupid' she told me very matter-of-fact.

'Yeah because nothing else in this game is stupid'

'Don't test me Michael.' 

'I wasn't suggesting stop Maria. I was saying that we SHOULD stop. My feet, words can not describe. So I want to sit down.'

'But the shops'

'Maria'

'So many so little time'  

 'Do you want to see me cry. Huh is that what?  Maria do you want me to stand here and cry?' Maria stopped looked at me strangely.

'Okay we will stop. Its okay honey.' She put her arm around me, great more damn weight. Okay just get to the bench.

'Hold up. If we go to the bench, whilst we sit there, there will be no talk of "eye spy" it will not be mentioned got it?' 

'Deal'

'fine' Maria said and we made our way across the street. 

 Its like a race, the bench is my big shinny gold medal.1step 2step 3step. Keep it up almost there.

When we finally got to the bench' we all sighed as we sat down

'I'm bored' Maria said 

'Maria we have been sitting here for 10 seconds' Michael said 

'Well how long you expect to stay here for??'

'Well I'm enjoying not hearing about that which will not be mentioned, I could stay here all day.'

There were a few moments of silence then

'Let's play twenty questions'

'Oh no. that's just another form of eye sp-' Maria turned to him a a huge grin crossed her face. ''damn' Michael finished

'You said it!!'  

'Well…I'm aloud because …I made up the rule'

'Yeah exactly YOU MADE IT UP!!'

'Maria what is it with you and eye spy? You're like a freak for eye spy?'

'Fine we won't play'

'Good' I said and let out a sigh.

'Hey Michael.'

'No. what ever it is the simply cleaned up answer is no.'

'Fine you probably can't do it any way.'

'No I probably can't' I laughed how did these too ever make it a year? It was like watching a skit. And although they tried to deny it and act all annoyed at each other, it's clear as day that they enjoy every minute of winding each other up. One thing is for sure there wasn't one dull minute with these two around.

'God I know I'm going to regret this. What, what is it that I probably  in your opinion I can't do?' a smile crept on too Maria's lips. The smile was fool of mischief and that's why before she turned back to Michael she made sure that the naughty smile had vanished from her lips. He was right. He was going to regret this.

'See that crash can there' she nodded towards the end of the bench were there stood a lone silver tin rubbish bin. 

'Yeah, what about it.'

'I bet you cant lift it up over your head'

'Ok not that I'm considering doing a stupid thing like that, but why don't you think I would be able to lift an empty crash can.'

'Well, didn't really want to say any thing, but…no, no I don't want to hurt your feelings'

'What Maria.'

'well I was talking to kyle, ad he happened to bring up how much he works out, and wow he does a lot. In the morning he gets up and straight away does 15 push ups, and does to the gym, and works on weights and ontop of that he did manual labor, and it got me thinking, you know how often you work out'

'I work out.'

'lifting burger after burger to your lips is not classified as working out.' You have to hand it to her, she is funny. 'so seeing you aren't in good shape, I don't think you could handle holding that over your head.'

'not in good shape. right then I will do it.' Micheal began to get up but maria pulled him back down 

'no micheal I don't want you to hurt your back. Its okay micheal, its ok that kyle is better then you' oh she is good hitting it were it hurts.

'I-I-I AM TOTALLY OUT RAGED BY THAT COMMENT. Kyle better then me, that wimp ha. Fine I will prove it.'

He went over to the crash can and without even trying swung it over his head. He turned back to me and maria, totally oblivious to the crowds of people on the busy highstreet that were watching

'see' he said proud of him self. Maria then put her hand over her mouth and deepened her voice.

'LOOOOOK HOW STRRRROOOONNNG I AMMMMMM!!!!!!' she said as loud as she could, micheal was right she could be pretty damn loud when she wanted to be. People stared and began to laugh. Me and maria collapsed in laughter. It was just to funny! Micheal quickly put the can down and sat back down.

'I hate you' he told us both.    

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**I have split the group but don't worry, the next chapter will have the other characters in them, its just easier this way. I want to make sue that I use them all and don't leave any out. So fanfictionairs, you will have to read to find out what happens next ,but here is a hint, I will be binging in some of Liz's family, we may even see Ashley again. Hmmm.   **

**I dedicate this to all the people that have reviewed. Lol I'm STILL A total kiss up…is it working?? Let me know when you REVIEW!! LOL tee hee**

**m**


	8. INTERESTING

**Title:3 aliens, 2 humans and me******

**Author: lizzie_bean******

**Category: haven't really developed much of one yet, but give me time******

**Disclaimer:**** I don't own any of the characters, but the point of view and wit is mine, but that's it**

**Feedback: I took the time to write it for sheer entertainment, the least you could do it feedback******

 **Summary :**** just the group after the final episode, read about there good and bad points the funny and the sad then review.  **

'Hey guys what's so funny'

We all stopped and instantly turned to the familiar voice from behind us. It had been 10miniutes since Maria made a fool of Mickey, and it was still funny. Although the funny situation that was just a classic one off moment had been and gone, we were all still able to keep it alive by replaying it in our minds, keeping Maria and I laughing our socks off, and Mickey's face staying the unnatural colour of purplish-red. The man is seriously peeved off. He is sitting there mumbling something about 'typical humans' and how 'this really blows'. maybe we went to far…maybe.

Kyle stood behind the bench looking down at us comically and I could tell he was holding back many spontaneous jokes.

'hey, what are you…' I managed to get out, in a squeak before I once again began to laugh uncontrollably when i saw the green rubbish can that got us in to this predicament. 

' guys wanted to find you, we are booked in to a hotel and since I have been here before, figured I come and find you…What?' Kyle said, obviously confused.

'Oh god Kyle… (Laughing)… it was… (Laughing)…so...' that was all Maria could manage before joining me in me fit of laughter

'So what Maria…funny??' Kyle helped out then looked questionably at us. Michael had his back to Kyle and was trying hard to get the Human colour back in his face, as if he knew that is Kyle saw his face, the jokes would roll on and on and on…

Maria looked up at Kyle, still unable to function her tongue; she simply made a thumbs up sign with BOTH hands. 

'Okay, that doesn't really help; in fact I pretty much gathered that by the laughing.' Kyle told us 'what I want to know it what happened to make to two the new giggly girls' Kyle asked us.

I looked at him helplessly then opened my mouth to talk, but nothing came out, well apart from a pretty god damn embarrassing snort. I shut my mouth then pointed in the direction of Michael on the other side of the bench. He was having NO luck getting the normal colour back, and I knew by the wicked look on Kyle's face that he wasn't going to cut Michael any slack, or let him cool off first. I would feel bad…if it wasn't so funny!'

'Michael you're pretty quite' let the sarcasm games begin. 'Since your not laughing maybe you can explain things to me'

No response

'I take it from the silence that the "funniness" was centred around you'

No response'

'Come on Michael, you big strong tough guy…' as soon as he mentioned the words "big strong tough guy" Maria and I instantly laughed harder. 'Tell me' Kyle ended, and a big grin spread across his face.

'look Kyle, I'm not laughing because…' at this point I could imagine him thinking to him self "think Michael think, think, THINK!!" …'what "happened"… that they are laughing at…the "thing" that took place, just wasn't funny and that's that.' He said very matter-of-a-fact. He crossed his arms, as if to say I don't want to discuss this any more. Have to give it to him; he did a good job of tip toeing around the embarrassing facts.

'So why are they laughing?'

Cause they are immense morons'

'Oh were the moron's space boy…or rather trash boy' Maria added.

'Trash boy…huh, in-ter-es-ting' he said. Keeping the smirk on his face. 'So I take it by the nick name that they ARE laughing at you…'

No response.

'Have you been lying to me Michael?!' voice full of fake outrage. These two seriously have it in for each other.

'Michael'

Michael…Michael, Michael…Michael, Michael…Michael, Michael…Michael

MICHEAL!!!!!!!! BY not answering me you will be forcing me to go to extreme measures.' 

'FOR CHRIST SAKES...Okay fine, if your life is really all that empty I will tell you the biter twisted truth. The two cackling sisters that you see before you here are laughing at ME. Yes that's right me, because cackling sister 1(points to Maria) made a fool out of me, in public by making me hold a crash can over my head in public view and cackling sister number two here (that would be me) knew all about her sisters evil plot and never even gave me a warning look, even through I stood up for her, so Kyle you're a comedy genius, well you like to think you are,  so tell me do you find that little story funny or unfunny?' Kyle stood there looking at Michael then at us then once again at Michael. Then he laughed. Then we laughed.

"Your all losers, how did I get stuck with such goons and losers'

'Elizabeth?' oh dear god I know that voice. Hearing it again immediately stopped me laughing and Maria, and even Kyle who had had a bad encounter with the person speaking, the year I brought him here. We all looked at each other, then Gathered another wits to turn and look and the utterly horrifying disturbing  man that makes any half decent person want to scream 'good god-I-need-to-get-away-from-this-sleeve-pronto.' 

'glad you lot have stopped being so immature, and know see that it is in no way funny…'Michael said, not quite catching why we had all stopped laughing. He finally turned around '…hey who's he…did I miss something'

 ****

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**What do you think? Sorry it's a bit short!**

** And I'm also Sorry its been so long,(not that any one has been checking the site for my post!) I have way too much media and lit work to do!!**

**I really want to know what you think, if you don't review, I will cry ****L**

**Keep me ****J**** REVIEW. A ****J**** writer is a better writer ******


	9. cartoons

Hello.you have all probably forgotten all about me, cause its been ages since I updated but here it is, so review if you like it so I know to continue. Thanks. Oh I kind of forgot the plot to my story, so I wrote this to try and ease my way back into this. Its just fun. Hope you like. M.

**Title:3 aliens, 2 humans and me**

**Author: lizzie_bean**

**Category: haven't really developed much of one yet, but give me time**

**Summary:well**** I have spit the group for this and am concentrating on micheal and maria. Its so fun writing for them. I am getting some amazing reviews and its so nice  to know that you are enjoying it.I thank you all. **

**Disclaimer:** I don't own any of the characters, but the point of view and wit is mine, but that's it

**Feedback: I took the time to write it for sheer entertainment, the least you could do it feedback**

Well, well if it isn't little lizzy parker, my little red riding hood and what's this? Her good friend goldy locks, who b the way get more stunning and beautiful and attractive and…' at that point he was cut of by the sound of Mickey clearing his throat LOUDLY. My disgusting uncle stopped and looked at Michael.

'oh sorry man. Didn't realise she was taken'

'well I was-' he was swiftly cut off by hurricane deluca

'WHAT! Okay I don't even know where to start on that sentence!'

'What ever do you mean Maria?'

What do I mean okay, 'I'm calm I'm calm.' So far I have been an outsider in this. A completely horrified one. HORRIFIED AT the nasty sexual way my uncle is looking at Maria, who by the way is ugly fat and has purple cheeks which make him look like a child socked him twice in both cheeks with their tiny little hands (inspired description from a Tec teacher. God bless him) and because he was mad he thought oh well I will eat him. (Are u getting the mental picture?)

This sick twisted pervert is going all goo goo and putting on his husky 'come hither' voice, which   over my best friend! And who am I to him, just his freaking niece! Where's the respect people where? Because I am not seeing it, you know why I'm not seeing it? Because there is none. That's why. Sheesh. So I'm sitting here musing in my anger/embarrassment, and then I ponder on to the thing that sends my way, way, way over the icy edge of doom. He called me red riding hood!!!! 

'how could you?' the words come sliding out of my mouth and I stand up to face the, the, the, the …thing that's insulted me.

'Excuse me?' is all he says. Other than that he just stands there with this stupid surprised, this-is-so-not-like-you expression on his fat purple face, and oh good god is that…dribble? I shredder. I mean purple cheek and all, is pretty much…yuck, but dribble, ACTUAL DRIBBLE, this isn't just crossing the line, this is jumping on the line over and over again and then sprinting away, until the line becomes nothing but a small, no tiny dot far in the dark distance. How on Earth did my auntie go a head and marry him, she must have been unconscious or drugged up, or suffering from amnesia, it's a possibility!!

So any who, I look at him and resist the urge to vomit right here, right now.

'Excuse me, is that all you can say to that, stupid comment that you made?'

'Well I just-'

'Cause if this is all you have to say, I mean seriously that just makes me so angry'

'yeah, yeah tell him parker!' all of a sudden everyone's eyes shift to Kyle as he makes this weird high pitched hooting noise, which I think, was supposed to cheer me on, but in actual fact made him sound like a girl. A cheerleading girl. So I'm looking at him thinking please god don't dance and start singing 'go Liz its you birthday' 

'Well, well, well, if it isn't…you'

'You?' Kyle says looking at my uncle with a half grin on his face

'Yeah, you'

'Do you even KNOW my name?'

'Wasn't important enough to remember' my uncle says with this smug expression on his round face.

'Well, that's one way of looking at it, but it could also mean that some ones losing there mind' he says in a sing song voice.

'Listen side kick boy' he begins and Michel mouths 'side kick boy?' to me and I simply shrug, perhaps Kyle's right maybe he is losing it. 'I am far from 'losing my mind. I am a big time businessman, and furthermore, I have a super processing mind, and am very youthful, for your information.'

Whoa some ones having a mid life crises. I know that why I should step in and try my best to control the situation. But I don't. This is more or less what happened the year that I took Kyle down here with me. Kyle and my uncle meet and both formed an instant dislike for the other one. So why don't I stop this now, well because it's really, really funny to see my uncle, who I hate, get all worked up. It's priceless. 

Kyle just looks up at him. He has this ability to be able to keep a straight face, even when every one else is falling apart with laughter.

'ok "super mental processing' if this is true, which it could be then, why are you unable to remember my name?'

'I told you side kick, you are not important enough to remember.' There s that smug face again. Yuck.

'rittttttttte. About this 'side kick thing' what's with that?'

'Well, your robin aren't you'

'Err no, no I'm not'

'No I don't mean you ARE robin, do you understand?'

'Wait, let me think this through, I'm robin, which I'm not, but I am? Me and Maria look at each other, completely confused with this.

'I mean batman'

'From batman??'

'Your not batman.' My uncle says that shakes his head as if he cant believe Kyle doesn't understand.   

'oh what gave me away?'

'he's batman' my uncle says then points to the disinterested Mickey besides me. He isn't paying any attention and it takes Maria's loud laughter to bring him out of his day dream.

'Did I miss something' he says once he realises we are all looking at him, very confused.

'What Michael?'

'Is that his name?'

'What about me?'

So I'm flipping robin and he gets to be the cool caped hero?

'What the…what cape?'

'Apparently your batman' I try and help out.

'WHAT SINCE WHEN?'

'And Kyle's robin' I help again

'Ha ha I get to boss you around'

'Hey don't laugh space boy, I think batman and robin were you know, gay.' Maria says. Micheal looks up and Kyle stops laughing.

'I don't think im batman'

'im defiantly not robin.      


	10. my little note to you all

Just a note.

Hey I know that I have totally neglected this story!

I'm sorry, but exams are almost all done with. Wooo hoo  I hate them. Drive me insane!

Any way I will continue that is if you want me to

            So tell me wotcha all think

I will be waiting impatiently….JOKE…or is it?

Hehehe seriously it's a partnership, u gotta post a reply that's how this works

Thank you

Oh does any one else think Seth from the O.C is extremely cute?!


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